Take me back to the start..

All I ever wanted when I was a little girl was to be a mum, a mum to boys to be exact. I remember my cousin LeeAnne having twin boys, Zachary and Jonathan. They were only around 28 weeks, I remember being excited, excited to meet them and cuddle them. My innocence as a kid coming into play, babies aren’t meant to die right? But that’s what happened, Zachary at birth and Jonathan a couple of months later.
From then on all I wanted, well actually needed, was a baby boy doll. My nana searched everywhere for one, finally finding my baby Jonathan. She knitted him a special little outfit, I was obsessed. Thinking back now, after being through a similar thing, my cousin LeeAnne was so strong. She didn’t need to be, but she was. I’m in awe of her!

Growing up I never forgot my love for that doll. I still have him in my cupboard, I will pass him on to Marleigh when she is old enough and I hope that she will love him just as much as I did. (Chanelle did play with him for a bit, but being a tomboy didn’t care for dolls and ended up drawing on him!)

When I met Adrian I knew he was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. The way he was with his gorgeous little three year old made my heart melt. He of course being a 19 year old had so much confidence, a fun loving nature and carefree attitude about life. Except when it came to his daughter, he was always in dad mode when she was around, forever putting her first. He had this kind of charisma about him, everyone knew him and loved him.

I was 16, young and dumb I would say. Meeting Adrian changed my life for the better. I had to be responsible and put my big girl panties on! My parents instantly fell in love with him, even with his tattoos, goatee and missing tooth (hahahaa!!). Meeting my grandparents, he was instantly part of the family and they always said he was a keeper.

We did stupid things, like move in together straight away and  only a couple of months later he asked me to marry him. Everyone must of thought we were crazy, but we both knew what we wanted and that was to be together forever.

Trying to plan a wedding so young was hard, nobody really took you seriously. I loved the idea of getting married at 18, the same age my mum was when she married my dad. I really think they were the only ones who really got it, being there themselves. Half way through the planning, with deposits paid and my dress being made I fell pregnant. Much to my parents horror!

And this the start of my journey to becoming a mum..